The Trap of Toxic Positivity

The concept of "toxic positivity" is increasingly discussed in the field of psychology. It refers to the social pressure to maintain a positive attitude in all circumstances, even when faced with real difficulties. Positive mantras, used excessively or inappropriately, can contribute to this phenomenon by denying or minimizing negative emotions. This emotional suppression can, in the long run, lead to increased anxiety.

The study mentioned at the beginning of this article, while the exact figure of 81% may be an oversimplification, highlights a real problem: when we constantly strive to think positively, we risk ignoring or repressing unpleasant emotions that require our attention. Instead of resolving them, we bury them, creating fertile ground for anxiety.

Why Certain Mantras Trigger Anxiety

Several factors can explain why some positive mantras are counterproductive:

• Unrealistic statements: Statements that are too general or too far removed from reality ("I am rich and famous") can create a feeling of cognitive dissonance, that is, a conflict between what we say and what we actually feel. This dissonance can generate anxiety.
• Performance pressure: Goal-oriented mantras ("I'm going to pass all my exams") can create excessive pressure and a fear of failure. If we don't achieve these goals, we risk feeling even more anxious and worthless.
• Emotion denial: Statements that deny or minimize negative emotions ("I don't feel sad") can be particularly harmful. It's important to recognize and accept our emotions, even the most unpleasant ones, so we can manage them in a healthy way.

Alternatives to Traditional Mantras

Fortunately, there are more effective and nuanced alternatives for cultivating a positive mindset without falling into the trap of anxiety:

• Realistic and specific affirmations: Instead of making unrealistic claims, focus on specific aspects of your life that you want to improve. For example, instead of saying "I am perfect," say "I am making progress in my work."
• Process-focused affirmations: Instead of focusing solely on the end result, emphasize the effort you are putting into achieving your goals. For example, instead of saying "I'm going to win this competition," say "I'm giving it my all in my preparation."
• Self-acceptance and compassion: Instead of denying your negative emotions, learn to acknowledge and accept them with compassion. Remember that everyone goes through difficult times and you are not alone. Kristen Neff, a renowned researcher in the field of self-compassion, emphasizes the importance of treating yourself with the same kindness and understanding you would extend to a close friend.

Mindfulness as a Tool for Emotional Regulation

Mindfulness is a practice that involves paying intentional and non-judgmental attention to the present moment. It can be a valuable tool for managing anxiety and cultivating a more balanced state of mind. By observing our thoughts and emotions without trying to control or change them, we can learn to accept them and let them pass without being overwhelmed.

Studies have shown that regular mindfulness practice can reduce symptoms of anxiety and depression, improve concentration, and promote a general sense of well-being. Numerous resources are available for learning mindfulness, including meditation apps, online courses, and in-person workshops.