The Anxiety of Positive Mantras: The Trap of Optimism
We are constantly bombarded with positive messages: "Visualize your success!", "Attract abundance!", "Be positive and everything will be alright!" Positive mantras, these repeated affirmations intended to reprogram our minds, have become a common practice in personal development. Yet, for many, far from bringing the promised serenity, these injunctions to optimism can generate insidious anxiety. Why? And how can we avoid this trap?
This article explores why positive mantras can, paradoxically, increase anxiety. We will examine the psychological mechanisms at play, the scientific studies that shed light on this phenomenon, and, most importantly, we will offer more effective alternatives for cultivating a positive and realistic mindset.
The Bias of Optimism and Distorted Reality
Optimism bias is a natural tendency to overestimate the likelihood of positive events and underestimate that of negative ones. While it can be beneficial in the short term by boosting motivation, it can also blind us to real risks and prevent us from adequately preparing for difficulties. Positive mantras, by reinforcing this bias, can create a significant gap between our expectations and reality, thus generating frustration and anxiety when things don't go as planned.
The Trap of Social Comparison
The age of social media has amplified the phenomenon of social comparison. We are constantly exposed to idealized images of other people's lives, which can fuel feelings of inadequacy. Using positive mantras to convince ourselves that we are as happy and successful as others can be counterproductive. It can reinforce feelings of inadequacy and exacerbate anxiety related to performance and success.
A study in the *Journal of Personality and Social Psychology* revealed that people with low self-esteem feel even worse after repeating positive affirmations that do not correspond to their inner reality.
The Pressure of Positive Thinking: A Paradoxical Injunction
The culture of positive thinking can exert considerable pressure. Expressing negative emotions becomes almost forbidden, seen as a sign of weakness. This injunction to always be positive can be particularly harmful for people suffering from anxiety. They may feel guilty for not being able to control their thoughts and emotions, which further fuels their anxiety.
As Susan David, psychologist and author of the book *Emotional Agility*, explains, "the tyranny of positivity" prevents us from accessing our full range of emotions, including those that are unpleasant but essential for our adaptation and growth.
Anticipatory Anxiety: The Driving Force of Worry
Anticipatory anxiety is the fear of what might happen. The more we try to convince ourselves that everything will be alright through positive mantras, the more we become aware of the possibility that things could go wrong. This awareness, paradoxically, can intensify anxiety. We begin to anticipate the worst-case scenarios, imagine disastrous consequences, and feel increasingly anxious.
A study conducted by Joanne Wood, a psychology professor at the University of Waterloo, has shown that positive affirmations can even have the opposite effect on people who lack self-confidence. They may feel even worse after trying to convince themselves that they are great.
More Effective Alternatives to Positive Mantras
Fortunately, there are more effective alternatives to positive mantras for cultivating a positive and realistic mindset:
- Self-compassion: Treat yourself with the same kindness and understanding you would offer a friend. Acknowledge your difficulties without judging yourself.
- Acceptance: Accept your emotions, even the unpleasant ones. Don't try to suppress or deny them.
- Mindfulness: Focus on the present moment, without getting carried away by thoughts and emotions.
- Optimistic realism: Set ambitious goals, but be aware of potential obstacles and prepare to overcome them.
- Gratitude: Take time to appreciate the little things in life. Keep a gratitude journal and write down three things you are grateful for each day.
"Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement. Nothing can be done without hope and confidence." - Helen Keller
Realistic Optimism for Lasting Serenity
Positive mantras are not a magic bullet for anxiety. In fact, they can sometimes worsen the problem. By cultivating realistic optimism based on self-compassion, acceptance, and mindfulness, you can develop lasting serenity and face life's challenges with greater resilience. Don't be afraid to explore your emotions, even the unpleasant ones. They are an integral part of your human experience and can teach you a great deal about yourself.
FAQs about anxiety and positive affirmations
Do positive affirmations work for everyone?
No, positive affirmations can be counterproductive for people with low self-esteem or who are going through a difficult time. It's important to adapt affirmations to your personal situation and use them judiciously.
What is the best way to use positive affirmations?
It is better to rephrase statements as questions or intentions, rather than absolute declarations. For example, instead of saying "I am confident," you can say "How can I become more confident?" or "I intend to be more confident today."
